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Sunday 30th April 2017  GMT

How to Pick Your Best Man for Your Wedding – Advice for Grooms 

So you have piped the question, asked her to marry you and she said "yes" without hesitation. You know the girl you want to spend the rest of your life with, but first there is small hurdle to go through – it's called planning the wedding.

The sometimes tough decision is to who to pick for your best man. This chap will be most involved in your wedding and carry the brunt of the responsibility of the groomsmen. Your best man will most likely throw your all important bachelor party, he'll look after your wedding rings on the big day, he'll convey your wishes to the ushers, he gives a toast and give a speech at the wedding reception, and pretty much stands by your side and keeps you from going barmy throughout the whole planning process and on the big day.

Therefore your best man should be someone responsible and reliable. Don't pick one of your underachiever buds for this job otherwise you could be left red faced. You need someone that won't let you down.

Generally a high school, college friend or roommate that has been part of your life on an almost daily level is a good choice as you will have some idea of their character and mannerism. If you are fortunate enough to have a long-term friend, then your choice is a no-brainer however do stop and think, ask yourself ‘are they the best choice’. If yes then your best friend is the obvious choice.

If you have a brother, he is also a good candidate for consideration as the best man. As the years role on your best friend could drift away after college, but your brother will always be your brother.

If you have more than one brother you can promote the other's to other important roles in the wedding such as ushers though diplomacy is the name of the game here and it may be best to choose your best friend. . But if one brother was the closest in age to you, got along with you the best, and spent the most time with you over all your other brothers, then there is nothing wrong with picking him as a best man.

While rare sometimes a groom will pick his father to be his best man. This is very touching and tells the world that you and your dad are really best friends and understand each other. It's an unexpected twist and will mean a lot to your old man. Don't feel pressured to do this though just because it would be you being nice to your dad he also has an important role within the wedding.

Remember to make full use of your best man, he will be a source of inspiration, help calm your nerves and support you at this special time in your life.

Whatever you do, go with your gut feelings. It's your choice and anything goes these days. You pick your best man based on who you want to be by your side as you embark on your married life.

The tradition of carrying one or more items that are "old", "new", "borrowed" and "blue" also comes from English. There is an old English rhyme describing the practice which also mentions a sixpence in the brides shoe. Something old, signifying continuity, could be a piece of lace, jewelry, or a grandmother's handkerchief. Something new, signifying optimism in the future, could be an article of clothing or the wedding rings. Something borrowed, signifying future happiness, could be handkerchief from a happily married relative or friend. Something blue, signifying modesty, fidelity and love, comes from early Jewish history. In early Biblical times, blue not white symbolized purity. Both the bride and groom usually wore a band of blue material around the bottom of their wedding attire, hence the tradition of "something blue". Originally the sixpence was presented to the bride by her future husband as a token of his love. Today, very often, it is the bride's father who places a coin in the brides shoe prior to leaving home for the church.

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